I have tried and failed many times to give up sugar. The main reason I fail every time is due to the copious amounts of vegan chocolate hitting the supermarket aisles (or possibly the addictive nature of the substance itself, who’s to say?). It’s my kryptonite. Everywhere I turn there’s a new vegan chocolate bar throwing itself off the shelf and into my basket without me asking it to. I don’t even WANT to eat them, but someone has to stop them from falling and hurting themselves. And so here we are. Or here I am. You probably have a perfectly adequate amount of self-restraint.

I get to the till and say to the cashier, ‘I don’t know how all these got in there’. They look at me with a knowing smile, and I think ‘you don’t actually know, but this is better than any milk chocolate you will ever eat, and even if I tell you now, you wouldn’t believe it, and will think of me as one of those fanatic vegans’. And you would be right. When I leave this store I will be fanatically indulging myself with some of the best chocolate money can buy, and I refuse to regret it. Not one single square.

Whether it’s truffles, biggggg old bars of choc or bitesize treats, there is a full range of options. I feel it is my responsibility to share the information I have gathered, with you. It’s only fair that you know what’s out there, so you too can become a fanatic, chocolate guzzling vegan. If that isn’t what you want, maybe it’s best you stop reading now. Continue at your own risk.

This time:

• MACRONUTRIENTS
• FOUND IN
• PRICE
• NO ‘BEST FOR’, as the answer would always be the same. EATING.

LET US PROCEED.

BOOJA BOOJA HAZELNUT CRUNCH TRUFFLES

Now, I’m not trying to suggest that I have discovered Booja Booja as a new brand. They have been around since 1999 (regretfully I only discovered them a mere 17 years later). But ultimately, they are some of the most delectable truffles in existence, vegan or not. Melt in the mouth, deep dark chocolate that is so rich. They come in in a box of 9 ordinarily, but they have quite recently released the 2-Pac(k) (RIP) which is pictured. It comes in 3 flavours – Hazelnut Crunch, Almond Salted Caramel & Fine de Champagne. Having @BoojaBooja in an ‘indulgence-on-the-go’ format is a life changer for me. Now, I can be known to have a packet of my Boos (can I call you that?), in my pocket at all times. Best to keep an emergency supply. You never know when (you or anyone else around you) might need them. My non-vegan taste tester mate, Dr. X, is an absolute Boos hound. So that’s it confirmed. Boos are life.

FOUND IN: Planet Organic

GALAXY VEGAN CARAMELISED HAZELNUT

I FEEL LIKE WE HAVE BEEN WAITING FOREVER FOR THIS TO HAPPEN, AND NOW IT’S HERE AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO FOCUS MY ENERGY ON ANYMORE. I FEEL LOST. I have been preparing for at least three years to re-enact the weirdly sexual @GalaxyUK advert of old. ‘Why have cotton, when you can have silk?’ AKA ‘why have morals when you can have milk?’. I was preparing to stroke the golden packaging of the chocolate, nay, even the chocolate itself, before popping entire segments into my mouth without chewing – how does she do that? It’s raining everywhere except in her mouth, or maybe also in her mouth. ANYWAY.

These are ridiculously good replicas of the original Galaxy, which I did used to consume in abundance. I could definitely take down a 360g bar, easy. I realise that my past is starting to sound like I spent a lot of time eating, and that would be correct. Don’t be fooled though, I still do. Just the vegan versions.

All 3 of these are so creamy – Caramelised Hazelnut, Caramel & Sea Salt and Smooth Orange. And NOW even the inimitable Cookie Crumble has been veganised. Idontknowhowitspossible, but the fact that it is possible gets me going – why not get rid of the non-vegan versj’s altogether? The free from fellas taste exactly the same. It’s impressive. The only thing I’m not so impressed by, is the price. This is £3.15 for 100gs. YIKES. For a ‘high street’ brand that’s a LOT. I’m hoping with time, that will be brought down as it becomes more readily available, and OBV more popular.

FOUND IN: Tesco (in the free from section)

MOO FREE – FREE FROM CHOCOLATE

Let me hear you say Moo Free, MOO FREE. This brand was an early discovery for me in my vegan journey, and boy was I glad to discover it. In basically every supermarket, you can find at least one bar from the @moo_free_chocolates range hiding out in the Free From section. Hiding, I would imagine, from the dairy-containing bullies in the standard confectionary aisle. Hiding, only because it’s hard for the dairy chocolates to accept that there’s a new kid on the block, that not only tastes better than them, but doesn’t make it’s purchaser feel guilty. I understand their shame. Moo Free understands it too. Hence keeping at least two aisles away. It’s not only that, but purchasing Moo Free has been clinically proven (by me in my non-existent clinic) to cause the purchaser a feeling of lightness and joy, never experienced by those purchasing from the dairy-ridden chocolate aisles.

My favourites, pictured, are the Bunny Comb and the Original Bar. But for the purposes of this blog I will stick with the Original Bar. It’s a very good alternative for milk chocolate, and quite addictive. If you are just looking for a classic, milk chocolate replica, this is your guy. If you listen hard enough, you might even hear it mooing to you from the comfort of your home. Not saying you will, but you might. If you do, it’s time to get down the shops. 

FOUND IN: MOOrrison’s

NOMO Caramel & Sea Salt

NO MORE MISSING OUT, is the tagline of Free From brand, Nomo. I had been hearing whisperings on social media about a new brand, that you just HAD to try. I couldn’t find one for the longest time, and then, Holland & Barrett (long may you provide) delivered the goods. The first one I tried is the one pictured, Caramel & Sea Salt Choc bar. OOOOOOHHHH yes I love it.

I’m always drawn to the salty chocolates. Do you think that’s because I was raised near the sea? I do. Salt runs through my blood, and in my eyes, and down my throat when I do that thing of trying to be a human bodyboard, but mess it up and end up tumbling to the shore with my head underwater. Instead of gracefully above it like a dolphin showing off. I always imagine myself to be graceful, somewhat like a happy dolphin, but I think there is mounting evidence to suggest quite the opposite.

ANYWAY. Nomo is delightful. All flavours. But if you have to choose, choose the caramel & sea salt, and think of me, and the Irish sea, and maybe awkward dancing. @Nomochocolate is Free from dairy, gluten, egg and nuts and 100% vegan so everyone can enjoy. So is the sea.

FOUND IN: Holland & Barrett, Tesco, Asda, Waitrose, The VeganKind Supermarket

RHYTHM 108 – Sweet ‘N’ Salty Almond

This was a surprise discovery. Found lingering in the shelves that flank the queue for the tills in Sainsbury’s. These shelves are normally designed to tempt you into purchasing something you don’t need. Which I fall foul to, regularly. I know what they are doing, and yet I still fall for it. Nearly every time. But on this particular occasion, I left the shop feeling smug, and like I had beaten them at their own game. @Rhythm108 are a chocolatier based in the Swiss Mountains, and they know what’s UP.

At the ‘shelf of temptation’ as I affectionately call it, Sainsbury’s stock 3 different bars from Rhythm 108. Hazelnut Praline, Super Coconut & Sweet ‘n’ Salty Almond. All three are glorious, but my favourite is the ALMOND. I have introduced SO many colleagues to these and the feedback is resoundingly similar – you cannot tell that this is vegan chocolate. They often say things like ‘I thought it was going to have that weird vegan vibe, where it tastes all healthy and stuff. But it doesn’t’. These bars are genuinely delicious and I’m not sure how it is achieved. They are gluten free, vegan, organic and have less sugar than your average choccy bar. Apparently, they take 3 days to make. Those 3 days are fully worth it for the results.

I found the 3 pack in a larger Sainsbury’s, but it’s dangerous to buy 3, as you will eat 3 and probably in sub 5 minutes.

FOUND IN: Sainsbury’s (on the shelf of temptation)

AND NOW… you guessed it! THE MASTER TABLE.

Want to know what on earth these chocolates are made of, if it ain’t dairy? Sure thing. What about a comparison per 100gs of the top level MACROS. Done. Even price, as you will find it in the shops. Yes, lad.

Don’t know about you but I’m now drooling at the thought of eating these chocolates. I might leave you here and go and buy them all. And probably eat them one by one in quick succession. Don’t judge me.

See you back here for the next in the series.

FGGV x